Volume 267, No. 14; March 24, 2023
March 24, 2023 — To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.
The Nation’s Oldest Newspaper™ • Editor: Steven Fowle • Founded 1756 by Daniel Fowle
March 24, 2023 — To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.
2018—Hoping not to get shot like their late peers, a million American students walk out of school to demand gun control that works. 1977—RIP Fannie Lou Hamer, organizer of the Mississippi Freedom Democratic Party, who said, “Nobody’s free until everybody’s free.” 1965—“Except for Vietnam,” the AP reports Richard Nixon saying, “U.S. foreign policy is in a shambles.” 1964—We still don’t know who killed JFK, but on this day a jury decided Jack Ruby killed Lee Harvey Oswald. 1961—A B-52, its cabin temps over 130° due to a heater snafu and its crew’s performance perhaps sub-par due to bennie use, runs out of fuel over Yuba …
2020—Dolt #45 states the obvious: “I don’t take responsibility at all.” 2019—Gambino family mob boss Frank Cali is whacked in front of his Staten Island home by a QAnon follower who thought “he was enjoying the protection of President Trump.” 2002—Asked about Osama bin Laden, George W.[MD] Bush says, “We haven’t heard much from him…I don’t know where he is…I truly am not that concerned about him.” 1968—Nerve gas drifting from the Army’s Dugway Proving Grounds in Provo, Utah, poisons 6,400 sheep in nearby Skull Valley. 1962—General Lyman L. Lemnitzer, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, OKs Operation Northwood, a false flag campaign of …
The U.S. and the U.K., said George Bernard Shaw, are two nations separated by a common language. Further distinguishing us from our former colonial master is our form of government—though GOP opposition to monarchy seems increasingly squishy. Our editorial position on monarchy was most recently published on February 10th, with a selection from Thomas Paine’s, Common Sense; herewith, a more succinct version: Britain’s first king was “nothing better than the principal ruffian of some restless gang, whose savage manners of pre-eminence in subtilty obtained him the title of chief among plunderers.” Unimpressed by William the Conqueror, Paine wrote he was a “French bastard landing with …
Read moreA Brief Dispatch Regarding the Impending Coronation
Watching Vladimir and Estragon on a nearly bare stage as they wait for Godot can, paradoxically, be a thrilling experience. Waiting for Merrick Garland to slap the cuffs on The Former Guy, on the other hand, is beginning to get tedious. Talk about pent-up demand. If Ticketmaster could sell seats to a DJT Perp Walk, its ensuing collapse would make last year’s Taylor Swift fiasco look like business as usual. And yet, we wait…and wait…. What—a seething nation might ask, boiling over in exasperation, had it not already been beaten down by a bitter succession of past disappointments—is the #@$&ing hold up? Being about as …
March 10, 2023 — To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.