Admiral Fowle’s Piscataqua River Tidal Guide
(Not for Navigational Purposes)
Portsmouth, arguably the first town in this country not founded by religious extremists, is bounded on the north and east by the Piscataqua River, the second, third, or fourth fastest-flowing navigable river in the country…read more.
2020—“[T]he numbers are very minuscule compared to what it was,” says Dolt #45, “[Covid is] dying out.” 2017—Brass on the U.S.S. Fitzgerald get their nimble destroyer rammed by a container…
2020—The Wall Street Journal publishes Mike Pence’s op-ed, “There Isn’t a Coronavirus Second Wave.” 2019—“Last Call” at The Hammer. 2015—For $50 each, 240 actors cheer on cue in the lobby…
2016—Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy [R-Calif.] tells colleagues, “I think there’s two people Putin pays: Rohrabacher and Trump.” 2006—The Supreme Court rules evidence seized by cops breaking “no knock” rules can…
2016—Lane Graves, 2, is killed by an alligator at Disney World. In response, Disney installs signs warning that alligators are present. 2001—Dennis Koslowski throws a $2.1 million party on Sardinia…
2005—Congress apologizes for having failed to pass 200 anti-lynching bills between 1882 and 1968. 1999—In Kosovo, British Lieut. Gen. Mike Jackson refuses NATO Commander Wesley Clark’s orders to take the…
2000—The Energy Department admits that two hard drives holding top-secret data on nuclear weapons have been missing for over a month. 1991—White House Chief of Staff John H. Sununu takes…
1995—In Claremont, N.H., Bill Clinton and Newt Gingrich shake hands and pledge to reform lobbying and campaign financing. Yeah, right. 1990—The Supreme Court rules flag desecration laws are unconstitutional. 1984—The…
1990—British Airways pilot Tim Lancaster is sucked half-way out of Flight 5390 when its windshield blows out over Oxfordshire. The plane lands safely; Lancaster resumes flying. 1988—The Justice Dept. says…
2016—Donald Trump’s son, son-in-law, and campaign manager meet at Trump Tower with a whole slew of Russians with peculiar associations. 1989—James Watt, Ronald Reagan’s Interior Secretary, admits to a House…
2003—Condoleeza Rice admits Pres. George W.[MD] Bush’s State of the Union claim that Saddam tried to buy uranium from Niger was “wrong.” 1991—In a National Victory Celebration, Abrams tanks and…
2018—Attacked by a bobcat in her Georgia driveway, DeDe Phillips, 46, strangles the rabid animal. 1997—At the fed-funded Bradbury Science Museum in Los Alamos, New Mexico, activists are arrested for…
2002—Donald Rumsfeld explains to the unknowing that unknown unknowns are “things we do not know we don’t know”—and he should know. 2001—Florida man Vance Flosenzier drags a seven-foot shark from…
2013—News outlets reveal that the NSA, under a Top Secret court order, has been Hoovering™ up the phone records of millions of Americans. 2008—Despite Mayoral objections and a lack of…
2017—It’s the last “Last Call” at Portsmouth’s Press Room. 2006—A Ukrainian man enters the lion cage at the Kiev zoo, saying “God will save me, if he exists.” He does…
2009—New Hampshire becomes the first state to legalize same-sex marriage without a court order. 2002—Egypt says it warned the U.S., a week before 9/11, that al-Qaeda was about to strike…
2002—The CIA admits to Congress—in a classified document, to avoid undue alarm—it had tracked one 9/11 hijacker months earlier than it had previously admitted. 1999—The Virginian-Pilot reports that evangelist Pat…
2020—The President asks, about people protesting outside the White House, “Can’t you just shoot them?” 2005—Having wrecked Iraq, Paul Wolfowitz starts on the World Bank. 2002—George W.[MD] Bush announces at…
2020—Irene Triplett, the last recipient of a Civil War pension (via her pop), dies at 90 in Wilkesboro, N.C. 2009—Dr. George Tiller, while ushering in a Wichita, Kansas church, is…
2019—The state Senate overrides Gov. Sununu’s veto: New Hampshire’s out of the killing business—except for that one Black guy on death row. 2007—Florida man Dale Rippy, a ’Nam vet, is…
2020—A U.S. President, scared by a protest against a Minneapolis cop’s murder of George Floyd, hides for an hour in the White House bunker. 2017—A U.S. President asks an aide,…
2009—Jonathan Trappe crosses the English Channel suspended from a cluster of 54 multicolored balloons. 1987—W. German Mathias Rust, 19, lands a rented Cessna in Red Square. 1986—The DOE calls off…
2017—It’s the last “Last Call” at Portsmouth’s Coat of Arms. 1994—Charles Rodman Campbell does his best to dodge it, but Washington State’s hangman finally manages to get a noose around…
2020—Minneapolis says a suspect died after “suffering medical distress.” 2004—The NY Times admits that its pre-war Iraq coverage was “not as rigorous as it should have been.” 1989—Future Veep J….
2020—A white Minneapolis cop murders George Perry Floyd, Jr. 2007—As U. Mass. hands an honorary degree to Andrew Card, George W.[MD] Bush’s ex-Chief of Staff, students and faculty howl and…
2005—“See,” mansplains G.W.[MD] Bush, “in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of…
2012—A mentally-unstable PNSY employee sets a fire that destroys the billion-dollar U.S.S. Miami. 1999—Wrestler Owen Hart drops 78 feet to his death in the ring; 15 minutes later, the show…
2022—Southern Baptists reveal their leaders have been conspiring for years to protect hundreds of sex abusers. 2004—Portsmouth’s Leftist Marching Band debuts in Market Square. 1980—Jimmy Carter gives South Korean dictator…
2016—In Houston, hundreds rally to support Islam. Hundreds more rally, armed, to oppose it. All have been duped by a Russian troll farm. 2001—GAO refutes the GOP: Dems didn’t vandalize…
